Sometimes teens feel like they don't measure up. That's because they compare themselves to the teens they see in videos or on television shows, where everyone has money, cool clothes and great stuff. In the real world many teens feel like it is hard to be positive. When we set our own standards, it is easier to feel positive. While we cannot change some things, like our athletic or musical abilities, or our body type, we can work on improving any negative qualities we have. Instead of focusing on what we do not have, we can focus on what we do have, and work to better ourselves.

This takes practice, and a commitment. Start by making a list of all the things you like about yourself. Tape it to your bedroom door, or to the refrigerator-someplace where you can see it often. This will remind you of all your good qualities. Set your own goals based on what you want, not what someone else wants. Joining a group or team can help in supporting your interests. Setting small goals and accomplishing them, can help, too. Tell yourself that you are a good person, who deserves good things and happiness. Avoid people who criticize or put others down. Giving some of your time to help others is bound to help you feel good about yourself. It is a great way to meet other volunteers with positive attitudes. A positive attitude is catching!

Sometimes, when teens have not really focused on the positive, they feel depressed or angry. If you or someone you know does not feel good about themselves, help them with some positive words. Try to see the good in others, and praise them for it. There are many good self-help books at your bookstore and library.

If you or a friend just cannot get rid of feeling a negative self concept, get some help. Your school nurse or counselor, a religious leader, or your healthcare provider can help.

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