Communicating with teenagers can seem difficult. Teens are filled with emotion, and feel a strong need to make their own decisions. But they are not yet adults, and are just developing the skills they will need to make well thought out decisions. They need their parents' help and guidance. Yet they often act as if they do not want the help. It helps to remember that the parent is the adult, and that the teen does need love, reassurance, guidance and advice. So how does a parent get through to a teen?

One way to start is to respect your teen. Respect their privacy in their phone calls, mail and need for private space sometimes. Respect their ability to make decisions. Do not put down your teens' worries as not important...that is discounting their real feelings. Another way to help improve communication is to let them make decisions about their clothes or hairstyle. You can help your teen learn about compromise by negotiating an agreement about clothes, hair, and curfews. Ask your teen what their opinion is on these topics, and ask them what they believe would be a fair compromise. Remember too, to keep a sense of humor. Be honest and expect that your teen will be honest too. Tell them what your concerns are, but do not compromise if you believe that your teenager is involved in something that could be destructive. At that point, you should seek the advice of a counselor or health professional. They can help direct you to resources in your community to help improve your relationship with your teen.

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